"Michell's Weekly Pearl"...(Feeling Guilty)



an advice column and a question on balancing life
Hi everyone! Welcome to "Michell's Weekly Pearl", where I seek Godly wisdom to offer encouragement. If this is your first time visiting, let me tell you a little about my advice series. This is where you can ask me anything(within reason) on marriage, women's issues, family matters, relationships, parenting, homemaking, or life in general. If you want an honest, biblical based, to the point answer, email me your questions via prowessandpearls@gmail.com (please put "MWP" in the subject area). I'll post your question, along with my answer, anonymously


"Feeling Guilty" asked....

Hi Michell! I was so excited about your new phase that I decided to jump right in…(still at work, but on break yay!) Speaking of work.  I absolutely love my job…I’m the boss:0, but sometimes I feel guilty for having secret desires of being a SAHM. I stayed home with my 1st child for 2 years and loved it, but hated it because I missed working. I tried to work part time, but it’s almost impossible when running my own business.  I think I’m doing a good job, but honestly, the pressure to be excellent in both areas leaves me exhausted!

How did you balance ministry with raising kids? Is there even a balance?

More questions to come…I wrote a paragraph and now I have to run ;)

Blessings,



Hi “Feeling Guilty”



You’ve asked a question so many mother’s battle on a daily basis! Unfortunately, there’s no easy answer! I was in retail management(about 20 years ago) when our two oldest were 3 ½ and 2 years old. Because of the crazy hours, I would sometimes go a whole day without seeing them. If I worked the night shift I would miss them in the morning, because my husband would get them up early to take them to the babysitter and by the time I got home at night(sometimes after 11pm), they would be in bed! I got tired of the crazy routine and sometimes going a whole day without seeing my babies, so my husband and I decided(after looking at the pros and cons of me staying on my job), that it wasn’t worth it! Unfortunately many moms, single AND married don’t have this option and my heart goes out to them! God is absolutely awesome, as He carried us through that season! There were things we were willing to give up in exchange for our peace. Your case however is a little different, in that 1)you LOVE your job and 2) it’s your own business. From the sound of it, your only problem seems to be your guilt for wanting to be home. You should NEVER feel guilty about wanting to be home with your kids, there’s absolutely nothing wrong with that…that’s your mothering instinct, lol! :-D  If I tell working mothers anything…it’s to NEVER feel pressured to be perfect. You’re a working/full-time mother/full-time business owner…you CAN’T be perfect, LOL! But, what you can do is work your plan to the best of your ability. Sounds like your plan is going great, btw! You can balance it all. There will have to be some give and take and coming up with ideas until you get it to work right for you, i.e.(going home and having lunch with your kids, having someone run it for you on Mondays or Fridays so you can have a day with your family, etc.). As long as your babies know they’re loved, they’re being nurtured by you, and your house is in order(hubby’s in agreement)it’s all good!! Besides, it’s an investment you and your husband are making for the future of your family. Who knows, one day your kids may run your business. How awesome would that be! 

As far as myself when it came to working full-time ministry and raising our kids, we had to literally think of it as a “family business”...ALL hands on deck! We all sacrificed and made an investment in the Kingdom for our future and God graced us…and here we are! It was hard, but easy at the same time. That’s what I love about His grace(it empowers us to walk out/through ANYTHING)!  And He DOES grace us for EVERY SEASON of our lives...but, we must be willing to walk in that season!! There’s a saying that goes like this…"play hard now, work long later…work hard now, play longer later”. With all that being said, the most important thing to do is to pray and seek GOD’S wisdom and guidance for what’s best for you and your family and the vision/plan He has for your lives! Hope this helped! Proverbs 24:3-4(AMP)

 I’ve been married for over 24 years to my husband, a pastor. I’ve worked alongside him in ministry full-time for over 17 years. During that time, we've pioneered two ministries and I've established a women’s ministry(Women of Excellence). We have three adult children and a son-in-law.  My areas of specialty are family, marriage and women’s issues. Hopefully the (Godly)wisdom I’ve learned through my years of experience will lead you to and keep you on the road to doing you well!  As my husband always says...why spend your life going down a road you don't have to travel, when someone else has already learned the lesson and can show you how to avoid that path.  

 Disclaimer: I don't profess to be an expert, but what I have learned...I'm willing to share.  With that being said...what I write on my blog is my opinion and advice. It is not my counsel. This also applies to anyone writing on this blog. If someone uses any advice, opinion or recommendation from this blog and is upset, angered, or harmed in any way, I am not to be held responsible or be held liable in any way. What I write on this blog is not to be taken as fact or absolute. My intention is to do no harm. The content in this blog is the opinion of this blogger and is not intended to disparage or malign anyone or anything that has the ability to be offended. I am not responsible, nor will I be held liable, for anything anyone says on this blog in the blog comments.
All Rights Reserved copyright© 2012-2013 Michell Pulliam “Prowess and Pearls” Devotionals by Michell Pulliam
Having a blast serving Him !

Xoxoxo
Michell








20 comments:

  1. I think it's great that you give advice like this! Good job!

    Win two Angelica nail polishes of your choice in my international giveaway :-)

    http://bigmegowski.blogspot.ie/2013/05/angelica-nail-polish-giveaway.html

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    1. Thanks so much Meagan and thanks for stopping by! I'll head over to your blog and check it out! Have a great week!

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  2. It is so hard to make these kind of decisions... but each mom and family can choose the path they feel most fulfilled in! I love your take on it all Michell!

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    1. Hey girl! Thanks so much! It really is a tough decision, and you're right, we all must do what's right for US. Thanks again Chris...have a wonderful week my friend! ;-)

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  3. No matter what a woman chooses in terms of working/staying home, we should support her. I don't like the bickering and judgement about how one is better than the other. I'm a SAHM, but support all the working moms out there!

    Another great question this week. You answered it well.

    XOXO,
    Meredith

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    1. Hey Meredith! IKR...I hate that too! Why can't we just support one another! Thanks for chiming in lady...have a wonderful week! :-)

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  4. new follower from aloha friday!

    www.violetlulu.blogspot.com

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    1. Hi Hanna! Thanks so much for visiting and for the follow...will head over to your blog in a few! Have a wonderful evening! ;-)

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  5. I love this!...story of my life ;) I can't believe your work schedule would keep you from seeing your kids sometimes. Such a sacrifice! "God is absolutely awesome, as He carried us through that season!" Love that! Looking forward to more pearls. Have a wonderful weekend!

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    1. IKR...it was a lot and something HAD to give! Yes He did Hope, yes He did! Thanks again for your support...may you have a wonderful week my friend!!

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  6. Now following on GFC--found you on the Aloha Blog Hop


    http://www.lukerfamilytales.com

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    1. Hi Staci!! Thanks so much for dropping by and following...headed over to your blog now! Have a lovely evening! ;-)

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  7. great post! i don't have children, but i love the industry that i'm working in and i've always wondered how other's balanced the two. thank you!

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    1. Hi Emily! Thanks so much for stopping by! It can be hard...but it CAN be done, lol! Thanks again...may you have a lovely evening!

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    1. Thank you Denise! Have a wonderful evening!;-)

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  9. I understand and empathize with her feelings and yours from when you were working. I have always known that I want to spend the most time with my children whenever the little blessing come:) That is part of the reason I chose my profession so that if need be, I can work part time and still draw enough income to help my family but not be tied to running the business day to day. When I say running the business, I mean like having to be there. The other profession I thought of was a Dermatologist and if they aren't at work, they don't get paid. Anywho, I hope she was comforted by your words of wisdom. Enjoy what's left of the weekend! I missed you yesterday. I thought you were coming to BBC Charlotte!

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    1. Hey Joi! Thanks so much! It is a tough situation and I sympathize with single mothers. It's a good thing you have a plan as to what you want to do. :-) I MISSED you all too! I so wanted to be there! I forgot I had a speaking engagement in Atlanta this weekend as well! I know you guys had so much fun...I'm waiting for a blog post(with pictures), lol! Have an awesome evening darlin'!

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  10. I'm always amazed at women who are able to balance family, ministry, and work. Sometimes I think the having it all mantra is a bit of myth. One may be doing it all but as you pointed out someone or something always sacrifices in it.

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    1. It is a myth Wanda! The only thing we can have it ALL in is "in Christ"! :-D Thanks so much for stopping by and chiming in...have a great evening lady!

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Thanks so much for dropping by...I really appreciate it! Please check back for a response to your comment, as I post all responses to comments here on the blog, not via email. Please note, as this is a Christian blog...any comment that contains offensive and/or inappropriate language will be sent to the authorities...NAH, but seriously though, they WILL BE deleted. :-) Have a great day...I call you blessed! ;-)